Kids say the funniest things. Part of it is a lack of knowledge and part is just their worldview. I love reading funny kid stories from parents. So today, I’ve compiled some of the funny stories from my own household.

Funny Kid Stories Parenting Humor

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1) My kids have been playing outside a lot this spring. My son is fascinated by bugs. One afternoon he saw lines of ants running through our flower bed. He excitedly ran to me and begged me to come see the “bug traffic!”

2) My 4 year old has really been into instructions and manuals lately. As we were cleaning the bathroom together, he found the instruction pamphlet from a tampon box. He gave it to me and said, “Here you go mom. This will help you to know how to do it right.” Um……thanks?

3) A few weeks ago, my 2 year old ran into the house and excitedly yelled “Your flowers blew up mommy!” In case you don’t speak “toddler” that means that the daffodils are blooming!

Funny Kid Stories from Parents #funny #funnyparentingstories

4) My son has been obsessed with root beer lately. He asked me if he could have some root beer the other day. It was the last bottle, and his little sister quickly piped up that she would like some as well. Naturally, I split it between him and his sister. He looked at her mournfully and said, “That’s a waste of root beer.”

5) We were ripping the wallpaper off the kitchen wall the other day. My son walked in from playing outside. Surprised by what we were doing he exclaimed, “What in the whiskers???!!!!”


6) Our kids think a little differently than other kids because they are growing up in a home that doesn’t keep bread on hand very often because they have two parents with Celiacs disease. So, apparently when you grow up in a gluten free home you have to specify when you want your meat on a bun. I crack up every time the kids say “Mom, can we have hot dog sandwiches today?” or “Can we have hamburger mayonnaise sandwiches?”

7) Before bed the other night my 4 year old son said, “Mom, I’m going to need some Pizza curtains.” Confused, I said ” What??!” He responded, “Well, look. I need some pizza curtains for that pizza window up there.” I looked up where he was pointing and sure enough, the half circle window in his room was divided into triangle “pieces.”

8) The kids were playing outside with my nieces the other day. They were soaking up the beautiful country air and picking dandelions and grass, riding bikes, and enjoying time together. I overheard one of them yelling “Weed for sale! Weed for sale!” Every adult within ear shot grinned and began to chuckle.

9) We have been potty training our 2 year old the past several months. The other day, she was in the bathroom with me. Impressed that I used the toilet, she proudly told me. “You did it! Now you get a treat mommy!” You can be sure that I had a Starburst. *shrug* I mean, I earned it.

That’s it! I hope you found something that made you laugh.

I really love hearing funny kid stories from parents, so if you have a funny story to share, I’d love to hear it! Feel free to comment in the section below!

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Funny Kid Stories