The Form:  A little parenting humor - what happens when you turn away for a nanosecond with toddlers... #funnykidstories #parenting #humor #lol #funny

PING. I get a text from my child’s pre-K teacher reminding me to turn in a form tomorrow for parent teacher conferences. I almost text back “what form?” but decide to check the colossal mountain of papers that somehow accumulated over the course of a week. As I look through the mound, I find an overdue bill, more coupons than the Krazy Coupon Lady herself could ever use, and our will, which is great because this will be my demise.

Our 3 year old, Violet, comes in repeatedly while I am working. Finally, I tell her to please go play, I need to get this done. She disappears for a nanosecond and instantly my son appears by my side, telling me that Violet has put lotion all over herself. I promptly go investigate.

Sure enough, when I enter the room, the guilty party has her head downcast…but it’s not lotion. Oh no, she’s not over moisturized herself. It’s gooey antibacterial ointment. She had climbed on top of a child-size table and used it to hoist herself onto the top of a tall shelf. While she was sitting on top of the world, she had found the antibacterial ointment and rubbed it all over her clothing, hair, and face. Awesome. I start to ask why or how or when this possibly commenced. I mean, she was gone for a nanosecond. Meanwhile, our youngest decides to mimic her sister’s actions and start the monumental climb herself.

Toddlers - trouble in a nanosecond.  Finding humor in the everyday struggle of parenthood #humor #funny #momlife #funnykidstories

I grab the youngest toddler, put her in time-out for not listening to me say no climbing the furniture. As I clean up Violet I tell her that we don’t climb the furniture and that consequences are coming. I don’t know what the penalty is for climbing furniture with intent to slather.

So, I take a moment to collect myself. I love it when I can use natural consequences…but this particular situation didn’t lend itself to anything of the sort.

I finally decide that cleaning her room is the proper compensation for applying cream in a reckless manner while scaling considerably tall furniture. Violet found the punishment was more than she could bear. A burden far too substantial for a child of 3 years old.

So she lodged a complaint with management via tantrum for 30 minutes instead of starting her unfavorable assignment. Meanwhile, you guys, I found my form! I filled it out AND I made supper…I may have overcooked the pasta a bit, but I’m calling it a win. Sometimes a parent needs a win. Especially if they lose a battle that involves ointment.

Motherhood.  The days are long and the years are short.  Also, the tantrums are long, and the peaceful moments are short.  #funnykidstories #funny #momlife #lol #humor

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